With Me All The Way
Updated: Jan 16
Mercury Retrograde is in the House! As I’m writing this, it is late February 2020 and the Pisces New Moon just rose in the Mercury Retrograde Season – the first of its kind this year. My experience this time around is showing me how far I’ve come on my life’s journey - even as far back as 22 years ago. It’s been very powerful.
There’s plenty of people who don’t give a nod to astrology (and I'm no expert) at all except when Mercury Retrograde comes around. Three to four times a year the planet Mercury appears to be spinning backwards from our vantage point here on Earth. This is said to put out a vibration that can wreak havoc on communication, relationships and starting new projects. Thankfully it only lasts 4-5 weeks at a time and there are plenty of ways to navigate through it successfully.
With the New Moon in Pisces appearing during Mercury Retrograde, we are told that we will be given the opportunity to see how far (or not) we have come on our journey. It is either a time to appreciate your efforts or reevaluate what you’ve been doing if you haven’t seen much movement forward in your growth. It can also bring forward people you haven’t seen or spoken with in ages or you might see individuals slip away out of your life. I was astonished how this played out for me yesterday – the day after the New Moon in Pisces appeared.
First of all, I heard from three different people with whom I hadn’t had very much contact - one of which I hadn’t spoken to for 6 years. It was a pleasant surprise when I opened up a note on Facebook from a relative looking for advice and guidance in an area, in which, I have a great deal of experience. What nice energy that was to reconnect and be of service. Later that day, I received an email from a spiritual colleague who was finally getting around to answering an email I sent her back in April of 2019. She said she was thinking of me and wondering how things were going. Even more than that, her entrance back into my life allowed me to read the email I originally sent her. It was amazing to me how much I had grown in just 10 months. My view and my circumstances have altered for the better and it was eye opening to see it in black and white. The last friend who stepped back in is someone who is always on an adventure. I live vicariously through her at times as I follow her movements, in her Facebook posts, all across the US. After not communicating with her since early January she sent me a hilarious text about of all things, hummus and how it makes you poo when you eat too much. So random. I lead a quiet life and I’m not much of prolific texter so to receive all of these notes and hear back from these ladies was a big deal for me.
The clincher was a vision I had during meditation later that night. To help you understand it, I have to explain a dream I had 22 years ago. In an earlier blog (My Psychedelic Dream, Jesus and R.E.M.), I described a dream I had that featured a prominent message from Jesus. That dream occurred just before the one I’m about to describe. Since my Awakening and Ascension, I’ve had lots of great messages in the form of dreams that featured Jesus but back then, this was a big, big experience for me.
In my dream, I was in the Holy Land, standing outside a particularly large grotto. I entered into the cave-like maw of the grotto and took in the view. Down the center of the grotto was a shallow stream that trickled steadily but slowly. On both sides of the stream were people who were suffering. They moaned and cried softly. They were in misery. Many of them were gathered around tall, plain wooden posts or poles, kind of like it was an anchoring point for them. They were wearing clothes from the days of the Bible - rather rag-like but all a dingy white. There were men and women alike and they didn’t seem aware of me. As I walked through the grotto, I stayed in the path of the shallow stream. The water didn’t even cover the top of my foot (I was barefoot). I wasn’t able to help any of these suffering people. I wanted to but at the same time I was held back from reaching out – I was aware that it was me, not anyone else, who was holding myself back from helping them. I was paralyzed and helpless to do anything because of my own fear and ignorance of their circumstances.
I could hear the trickle of water dripping from the grotto ceiling and even though I was in a cave, there was light coming in from a small, side entrance. At the end of the grotto was a wall with a ladder pushed up against it. At the top of this primitive, wooden ladder held together with rope, there was a small landing. On that landing I could see a simple wooden desk (again, primitively built). Jesus was sitting at the desk and there was a short line of 3 or 4 people, modern people, standing next to Him waiting their turn to speak with Him. When I got up to the landing, I saw that Jesus was handing out assignments to each person and sending them off on a divine mission He had given them. When it came my turn, I was excited to embrace a new path but instead I was told that I needed to remain here. I had business to take care of right where I was at. That’s when I woke up - disappointed and confused.
I have puzzled over that dream for quite a long time and told it to several people over the years. Who were the suffering people? Why wasn’t I able or willing to help them? Why was I even in that grotto and why did I have to stay put rather than going out on a new mission path like the others ahead of me in the line? It wasn’t until last night, that I got the answers.
As I lay down to meditate, I felt myself standing outside of this grotto once again. I almost didn’t recognize it and was going to walk away when something said, “Go in and look around.” I was a little apprehensive about doing this because of the scene that had played out in front me so long ago. I didn’t want to witness the suffering of those people again. But, when it comes to my spiritual journey, I have a habit of rolling up my sleeves and meeting the challenges head on – throwing all my cautions away and trusting the God is with me all the way. So, I walked in.
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. All the people were gone and so were those poles to which they were energetically anchored. The shallow, slow moving stream had cleared up, the ladder was gone and so was the desk and chair. Even the dripping of water from the ceiling had evaporated. But why? Where did they go? And then it dawned on me – those people represented all of my sorrows, my karma and my past lifetimes of experiences that I had worked so hard to clear out – especially in that last 2 years of becoming deeply, spiritually aware of my path. There must have been a hundred or more people in that cavern and there were poles everywhere. But now they were gone. And at that moment, the revelation of freedom, accomplishment, gratitude and self-satisfaction overwhelmed me. I sobbed. This is what I had been guided into by an unseen, loving hand. This is why I had to stay in place and take care of my business and not move into a mission path. My karma grotto had to be cleared out, transmuted into higher vibrational energy and only then would I be released to walk into a new mission. This message comes at a time when I’m wrapping up an old cycle of primarily taking care of others at my own expense and beginning a new cycle of learning energy healing practices to teach people how to heal themselves just as I’ve learned to heal myself.
That’s a pretty darn, big Mercury Retrograde message and I will never forget it. In fact, I’m writing this blog not only to share my experience of Divine Guidance but so that I can read it from time to time and remember where I came from, what I went through to be free and why it matters.
And in my MeWe Group: Bent To Balanced
Also on YouTube: Bent To Balanced