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Twin Flame: Self-Love Mastery And What That Means

Updated: May 16


I unexpectedly found myself on the Twin Flame journey (popular name for it) almost 3 years ago. I had never heard of Twin Flames and I didn't realize what I was experiencing until I was about 10 months in. I was strongly guided by Spirit through synchronicities and signs to articles and videos regarding this heavily spiritual phenomenon. By this time, the person I believe to be my divine counterpart and I were in Separation. For the following year, after I had this Awakening, it was a whirlwind of both Ascension ecstasy and tower moments. That first phase of the journey, where old karma from this life and past lifetimes is cleared and healed, damn near emotionally depleted me. But like a phoenix, and so many other Divine Feminines before me, I rose out of those ashes, thanking God for the Beauty He had given my soul in their place. That Beauty came in the form of realizing that I had gained self-love mastery (through learning to set my boundaries and using meditation)... and that is where the whole game changed once more.

Self-love mastery involves a radical acceptance of yourself and requires a spiritual journey of purging old issues and belief patterns – refining them - so you can stand in your own authenticity… free from anxiety and regret. From there you begin to realize just how strong and empowered and valuable you are. You’ll intrinsically know you have something to share – even though it might not yet be entirely clear what your message is or how you will deliver it. Patience… you will be led to it. Guaranteed.


After going through that initial phase of the Twin Flame journey, I have dedicated myself to gaining knowledge - expanding my view and understanding of my spiritual development and the metaphysical tools available to me. Most importantly, I started sharing what I've learned after I felt the strong call to start writing a blog about my spiritual experiences.

What’s Meant To Be Will Always Find You

Here's what I’ve learned that will hopefully help the Divine Souls who are in those early stages of the Twin Flame journey. I know you think it's all about you and your Divine partner coming together in Union (and that will be a great moment when it finally comes) but that spark that catalyzed your Awakening and catapulted you into the Ascension process, was just that... a spark. And it was all about you more than your soul partner. And, whatever your soul partner experienced was all about them and had little to do with you.

What you had with them is nothing compared to what you will co-create with Spirit/God/Source for yourself… without a divine partner in sight. I know you want more with this amazing soul who feels like home - the person who’s eyes you look into and can see infinity. You long for it with a yearning you've never felt. But that desperation of longing, not the longing itself, has to be burned off in the Refiner’s Fire – this is the refinement process of merging your soul and spirit with your human form. And it’s painful. However, this is also the energetic way to open all three to each other so they can heal your wounds and destructive patterns and finally rise up together and anchor into the 5D consciousness.

It’s the energies you share that brought you together in human form and when you finally reunite again, those same energies will have transformed you both into new people ready to engage in high vibration with one another. A whole new experience will have been born so you can engage with one another for more learning and more refining and learning to live in unconditional love... sucessfully. The pain, the desperation, the guilt, the anger you once felt because this journey had given you so much frustration…they will have been winnowed out so that initial spark can now truly become a constant flame. But that’s only if both of you choose the path of healing. Bear in mind, this relationship is a two-way street and your partner or you can choose to not engage at any time. But through that gain of self-love mastery that I was talking about earlier, you will be able to see them through eyes of grace and compassion, even if they don’t belly up to the bar. You’ll know you’re still connected, and you’ll be strong in yourself to let them go with your unconditional love surrounding them and yourself. You will trust that they can and will handle their journey and healing in their own way and pull your energies back from them so you can focus on what's ahead for you.


Healing


Your superpower is in healing yourself – and it’s one hell of a superpower. You don’t need your Divine Counterpart to be present for this to happen. In fact, for most, it’s preferable if your soul partner is nowhere to be found while you go through the messier parts of your journey.

So, what happens to your soul connection during all of this? Do you lose it completely? Not in my own experience - not if that connection is a true Twin Flame connection, anyway. But the way you engage with the memory of your Beloved and their energies does change. As you build and experience self-love by maintaining your hard won boundaries and exploring your gifts (mine are writing and strong empathic abilities) you'll find that the energy from the connection, rather than draining you or feeling like a tether you can't escape from, becomes a platform of light that you now stand on. And the energy of that platform, that solid foundation of self-love and spiritual exploration, runs through you at all times. Your Soul Partner is still a factor and you will feel their energy connect with you, producing confusion at times, but you will master how to navigate this. You will definitely learn to let it in and say hello, while feeling the love it brings to you, rather than loneliness and longing.

This is the place you are headed towards - even though it might not feel like it right now. My best advice to get to the other side, is to roll up your sleeves and get to work on clearing out your pain, attachments and expectations. Discover your karma and heal it. Connect with Facebook groups, people you meet on social media, or local metaphysical and spiritual development groups to learn and grow with. Let Spirit lead you. On my own journey, I have been introduced to many people who provided comfort, support and revelation at just the right times. Some of these have become lasting friendships and others were only meant to walk with me for a time. Pray that God will protect and guide you and then trust and be grateful for that guidance and protection.

Just a word from the wise... you might want to be choosy, at first, with whom you reveal this journey. Not everyone is a Twin Flame and they might not be able to validate and share this miraculous path you are on. Once you get to that place where you are experiencing 5D consciousness more regularly, your confidence and truth will override any skepticism received. Sticking with people who help to raise your vibration through guidance and understanding is invaluable healing.


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Find me on Facebook: Bent To Balanced and YouTube


*DISCLAIMER: I am not a licensed mental health professional nor am I claiming to be - the information I'm sharing here - the links above - are resources that have helped me recognize patterns more clearly. NONE of what I shared here is a substitute for professional therapy. If you need or are seeking professional help to heal any of these issues, I highly recommend finding a qualified therapist and/or a grief/loss expert. I'm simply sharing my experiences and general information that is freely available on the internet that has been highly beneficial to raise awareness of very common relationship patterns. If you need personal help with any of these issues specifically, please seek a mental health professional to assist you. *

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