The End of My Twin Flame Path??
Hoo Boy! That’s a loaded title for a blog. And I’m sure it is either confusing, triggering or confirming for you if you find yourself on what’s popularly called the Twin Flame Path. It is a journey that takes you completely by surprise plunging you into multiple Dark Nights of the Soul, a longing and pining for another person that seemingly won’t be quenched, purging of karma and negative energy from multiple lifetimes and lessons, lessons, lessons. Sound familiar?
My journey started three years ago when I casually greeted a new man who strolled into my life. Within minutes of meeting him, I felt my soul, really felt it dancing within me and saying excitedly, “He’s here! He’s here!”. I had never experienced my soul in any recognizable way before then and it took me a few days to figure out the source of all this revelry. In the meantime, the dance and the message in my head kept playing – in fact, it did not stop for 2 months! It felt like pure joy. Little did I know what kind of depths the nine-month friendship I had with this man would plunge me into over the next 3 years.
I laugh when people tell me that they are trying to manifest their Twin Flame – be careful what you wish for. It is no fairy tale. Prepare yourself for depths of emotional upheaval - blissful highs and catastrophic lows - like you have never seen. While I do not regret one minute of this journey, and I cannot even fully express my gratitude for the personal changes it escorted me through, it was damn rough, extremely painful and crazy making.
Fortunately, I have come through to the other side incredibly wiser, far more whole and focused for all of the releasing of old beliefs, negative ancestral energies and of course, the clearing and transmuting that I had to do. Three years of focusing on my spiritual growth were all powerfully catalyzed by a single person who I thought I could not live without. But now that so much of that tumultuous personal energy and the issues that went along with it have been resolved and cleared out, I find myself very disinterested in the soul connection and especially the person with whom it all began.
And you know what? I think it’s all still part of the same journey. I mean, the growth, healing and lessons learned have all culminated in a very changed me. I am more confident, I clearly state and honor my boundaries, I have found a soul mission, many interests and found some like-minded people to call friends along the way. I hear there is an uptick in feeling exactly the same way amongst the Divine Feminine collective who have been on this path for as long or longer. After clearing out so much junk in my spiritual trunk, I am ready to focus on myself and see what else I can accomplish and who else I can help along the way.
I have not abandoned the soul connection energies or my divine partner, I just don’t think about it so much anymore choosing to push ahead on my own plans for myself. I’m now certified as an Integrated Energy Therapy (IET) practitioner and I’ve put together a nice little healing room in my home in which to practice. I’ll be learning a few other energy healing modalities before the year is out and I’ve even developed an interest in gardening, organic foods and making jewelry with semi-precious stone beads. All of these things were a result of this journey and allow me to live the low key life of staying in the flow that I’ve always wanted.
My soul connection energies and my Twin Flame’s Higher Self support me in these efforts. They provide a solid foundation from which to launch a brand new and incredibly unique cycle of growth and self-love for myself and I’m loving it. I kind of wonder if my Twin Flame would get in the way of my progress in those efforts if he showed up right now so I don’t seem to mind that he has been silent for a good long while. That's new, too - feeling a bit of "meh" on seeing him again or not.
In fact, when he comes up in my thoughts – whether it’s in a happy way or something that feels hurtful - a phrase from the movie “Eat, Pray, Love” comes to mind (click the photo to see the full scene). The lead character, Liz, lamenting to her friend, Richard, over the pain she feels in regard to a lost relationship, is rather tired of the same pain revisiting her again and again (sound familiar?). His advice to Liz was to “send him Love and Light and drop it”. Simple as that. Good advice. It works, too.
Because of all of this great forward motion, growth and healing am I at the end of the Twin Flame path? Probably not. Will I ever reunite with the one who catalyzed a lifetime’s worth of clearing and lessons into three short years? No clue - although I would welcome it.
I think that this soul connection path will always be a part of me and will likely ebb and flow in various ways for the rest of this lifetime. I've learned to passively watch life unfold like a movie and withhold expectation. So, I think it will be delight to just allow all the energies between us to work themselves out into new cycles, new communication and new healing. And by actively pulling my energy back to myself rather than allowing it to reach out in sadness, demand or desperation to him or anyone else, I have become more of a woman, more of a force and more of who I really am. And that is something I can count on.
Seems obvious but there’s something you should know. I’m not a medical or psychological professional so anything I write and publish comes from my own experiences. I share these experiences to help others open their mind and think a bit. It’s not a substitute for sound medical and psychiatric advice from a professional - just a laywoman looking for understanding and reporting on what she found at this point on her journey. We all need spiritual guidance as much as we need medical help so use your discernment to get what you need when you need it.
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